A memory game can be offered from around 18 months, as long as you start small: 6 cards, or 3 pairs, as Naître et grandir recommends. At this age, your child doesn’t yet play by the rules. They turn cards over, look at them, name them and match up identical pictures with an adult. The real memory game, taking turns, tends to come together at around 3 years.
This gap between the age printed on the box and what a toddler actually does explains many an abandoned game. Here are the age milestones, what the game develops and how to adapt it.
Memory game: what age to start?
Not all sources give the same age, and it’s worth knowing so you don’t worry. The memory game rules sheet published by Naître et grandir says “from 18 months” and recommends starting with 6 cards for a child of that age. The same website, however, lists the memory card game among activities for 3 to 5-year-olds, in its feature on introducing children to maths.
The two recommendations complement each other more than they contradict each other. At around 18 months, a child can handle the cards and recognise two identical pictures. The full game, which means remembering where the cards are and waiting for your turn, becomes possible later, often between 3 and 4 years.
Before 18 months
Babies already group objects together. Naître et grandir notes that before the age of 1, a baby picks up the objects within reach to make a set. Cards, on the other hand, are mostly things to put in the mouth. It’s better to wait and offer hide-and-seek games with a toy, which exercise memory in a different way. Our article on baby memory explains what a young baby remembers.
From 18 months to 2 and a half
This is the age of pairs found together. Between 1 and 3 years, a child becomes able to group objects that share similar features. They point to a card, look for its twin among three or four visible pictures, and are delighted to put them side by side. Naître et grandir notes that before 2, children find it hard to express what they remember: ask them to show you rather than tell you.
From 2 and a half to 3
Between 2 and 2 and a half, a child better understands similarities and differences in shape and size. They can start playing with the cards face down, with 3 or 4 pairs and plenty of help. Waiting for their turn is still hard, and that’s normal. The full rules will come later.
What the memory game develops
A memory game calls on several skills at once. Naître et grandir mentions visual memory, which retains the picture, and spatial memory, which retains the position.
- Observation. Spotting the details that tell two similar pictures apart.
- Association. Understanding that two cards go together because they are identical.
- Working memory. Keeping in mind where a card was turned over a few seconds earlier.
- Language. Naming what you see: “an apple”, “another apple”.
- Social skills. Waiting for your turn, accepting not finding a pair, congratulating the other player.
The Naître et grandir sheet adds self-confidence and shared enjoyment, which nurtures the attachment bond. So the game is less an exercise than a moment together.
Matching two identical pictures also paves the way for sorting and classifying. These are the same skills your child uses to recognise shapes or to recognise colours.
How many cards for a memory game with a toddler?
Three pairs are enough to start with. Naître et grandir advises starting with 6 cards, then increasing gradually: 4 pairs, then 6, then 8. The number of cards is adjusted to the child’s abilities, so that the challenge stays stimulating and realistic.
A shop-bought box contains far more cards: the one in the Naître et grandir sheet has 32. There’s no need to get them all out. Keep three or four pairs that are very different from one another, and put the rest away. You can then vary the pictures from one game to the next.
How to play memory with a child under 3
The classic rule is simple: the cards are laid face down, each player turns over two, keeps the pair if the pictures match, or puts them back if they don’t. With a toddler, you go step by step.
Step 1: cards face up
Lay out three pairs face up. Pick up a card, name it, and ask your child to find the same one. This is a matching game, without memory as such. It already helps them understand what a pair is.
Step 2: just one card hidden
Leave the cards face up, then turn just one over while your child watches. Ask them where the twin of the card you’re holding is hiding. They practise remembering a position, with only one thing to memorise.
Step 3: the full game, very short
All the cards are face down, but there are only six. Take turns, spacing the cards well apart. The Naître et grandir sheet points out that watching the game helps a child remember where the cards are. A game lasts two or three minutes: stop before your child gets bored.
Other ways to use the same cards
The same sheet suggests several variations depending on age.
- From 18 months, show all the cards that feature the same character, object or colour.
- From 18 months, group identical cards or cards that have something in common.
- At around 2 and a half, draw a card from a fabric bag and say what it shows.
- At around 3, make up a story linking several pictures.
Naître et grandir also suggests tactile cards with different textures, and changing the layout to make the challenge harder. Sorting socks into pairs when doing the laundry exercises exactly the same sorting and comparing skills.
Which memory game to choose for a toddler?
For a child under 3, a few simple criteria are all you need.
- Thick cards, made of sturdy card or wood, easy to grab and turn over.
- Simple pictures: a single object per card, on a plain background, with no unnecessary detail.
- Familiar objects: animals, fruit, everyday items your child can already name.
- Clearly different pairs at first, to avoid confusion between two similar pictures.
- The CE marking and the age indicated, which you should respect because of small parts.
A homemade game works just as well. Two identical family photos, stuck onto thick card, make excellent cards. A few well-chosen toys that are brought out often are worth more than a full shelf: that’s the idea behind our article on free play with fewer toys.
Memory is happily played on the floor, like the shape sorter and the first inset puzzles described in our article on baby puzzles. A flat, clear surface stops the cards from sliding about or getting mixed up.
My child isn’t interested in memory: should I be worried?
No. Memory isn’t a developmental milestone, it’s one game among many. Naître et grandir points out that age milestones are only a guide and that every child progresses at their own pace. Many children prefer to move, stack or play pretend before sitting down for a card game.
If your child loses interest, put the game away and bring it out again a few weeks later. A game rediscovered after a break often feels new. Waiting for their turn, meanwhile, develops alongside other two-player games, as our article on the age at which a child starts to play with other children shows.
If other signs concern you, such as not pointing, no shared gaze or no first words, talk to the doctor who looks after your child.
Key takeaways
- The memory game can start at around 18 months, with 3 pairs and cards face up.
- The full game, cards face down and taking turns, becomes possible at around 3 years.
- Increase the number of pairs gradually, at your child’s pace.
- The game exercises visual and spatial memory, observation, language and patience.
- Thick cards with simple pictures work better than a big box.
Sources
- Naître et grandir, “Les jeux de mémoire”, updated July 2022, scientific review by Geneviève Cadoret (UQAM).
- Naître et grandir, rules sheet “Jeu de mémoire – Règles du jeu” (Chaminou game, from 18 months), undated.
- Naître et grandir, “Comment éveiller l'enfant aux mathématiques?”, updated June 2023, scientific review by Charlaine St-Jean.
- Naître et grandir, “2 ans à 2 ans et demi: développement cognitif et langagier”, updated October 2026, scientific review by Agathe Tupula Kabola.
